Black Coffee

I drink my coffee in the morning
Black and bitter like everything else in my life is
Outside my window, rain is pouring
Raindrops are salty tears I’m too familiar with
I stand naked underneath the shower
Everyday I pray I will finally feel unstained and clean
But there’s simply not enough water
To wash away the blood, tears, memories and all that’s between
I hold my breath for as long as I can
Am I strong enough to fight my instinct to survive?
I breathe in against my will and I don’t understand
How can one be not dead but far away from being alive?

28 thoughts on “Black Coffee”

  1. coffee in the morning? Ramadan Kareem! 😉 … just kidding

    those are some really good lines.

    though i didnt get what you meant in the final stanza.

  2. hishmaj, thanks
    well I don’t usually explain my poems because I think readers should understand and relate to them in their own way 😉
    Holding your breath is a mini-suicide attempt after you’ve come to be tired of the lifeless existence but everyone has an instinct to survive that prevents him from doing that. And existence doesn’t equal living

    his sweetheart, always complimenting 😀

    Hind. thank you

  3. A Global Citizen, I love depressing poems and stories lol I’m a sadist I guess O_O well not really but pain is the best source of inspiration while happiness is selfish and doesn’t like to be shared unlike misery which loves company

    his sweetheart, 🙂

  4. “How can one be not dead but far away from being alive?”

    ..what is your definition of being alive?

    I like, and agree with the words you directed at A Global Citizen up there. Very true, but there are different kinds of happiness, no? Some, can be shared.

  5. I agree, Bassem, that sadness is inseparably connected to human nature. Gloomy, depressing experiences, undoubtedly, have always inspired the greatest poets, resulted in creating remarkable literary pieces, and sometimes even led to sublimity.

    Happiness, however, can’t be synonymous with selfishness. It is the one thing that all human beings, since the early dawn of time, have intuitively sought. How can you be selfish when you’re simply exercising your God-given right to attain happiness, to seek that contented, peaceful state of mind that every human being desires?

    Besides, happiness is very contagious. It doesn’t restrict itself to the one
    person who successfully finds it, but generously spreads its joyous, magic charms to include those around him/her. If you surround yourself with happy, cheerful people, chances are you’ll find yourself happy too. Don’t you think? 🙂

    P.S: I still believe your poem is beautifully written. I suppose I only yearned to read something a little more positive, more optimistic, perhaps. 🙂

  6. manutdfanatic,
    “..what is your definition of being alive?”
    as I said above, existence doesn’t equal living. When you feel happy, satisfied, thankful for each day, enjoying the present and looking forward to the future constitutes what I believe to be “living”
    but simply passing through days from one to another without much difference or even simple joys means you’re just “here” nothing more

    yeah some kinds can be shared I guess but in general, misery does love company and you don’t see anyone complaining of being happy now do you?! 😉

    and yes I’ve had my share of pain like most ppl in this world I guess. Probably worse than many but better than many at the same time so al7amdellah

    A Global Citizen,
    I’m not saying that it is selfish to pursue happiness 3la al3aks it’s something we all desire but I guess in most cases once it’s attained a lot of people try to hide it for various reasons whether it’s fear of the “evil eye” or not wanting to cause even more misery to those depressed for whatever reason or just enjoying it to the max for fear it won’t last

    and I don’t like to surround myself with happy people 😛 lool they truly annoy me! especially if i’m not feeling that “preppy” myself because a) I don’t wanna feel like I’m raining on their parade by being gloomy or b) I don’t want any to think how lucky he or she is because they’re not in my place !
    Happiness isn’t contagious in my case lol but I guess people are different 😉 I’d prefer to have someone around who’s in my shoes

    I have plenty more of dark depressing poems lol the happy ones are rare but I’ll see what comes up with me

  7. “and I don’t like to surround myself with happy people”

    LoL. Laih bs?

    Hmm that’s kinda weird, Bassem. I don’t know how surrounding oneself with happy, joyous people can be ‘annoying’. Maybe you just happen to surround yourself with the ‘wrong’ happy people. Ever gave that a thought? 😉

    Wish you happiness, anyway! 🙂

  8. Fo0f, you keep disappearing! Where do you go when you go? <– it’s a song
    I miss you 🙂
    And I know that’s it’s been a LONG time since I’ve written a happy poem but you never know…. one day

    sawsan, glad you do

    coookies, you saw hope in my poem? that’s remarkable ! lol

    A Global Citizen, lol I don’t know wallah… I’ve found that I have less tolerance than I used to have for many things… I feel old I guess ! The point is, I guess I’m not into happy people really lol for a couple of hours it’s fine but more than that it’s just too much for me !
    and thanks for the wish 🙂 wish ya the same too

    Natalia, Khalil Gibran is always brilliant

  9. For some reason .. yeah i did ! its like when ur ready to give up but w/o realizing it ur still holding on to the last string .. i do tend to get dramatic sometimes ;p

  10. cooookies, lol well you managed to read between the lines… it’s that little bit of hope that sustains us

    Lino, thank you 🙂 It’s always nice to know that something I wrote can touch someone

  11. How can one be not dead but far away from being alive? >>> 42 checks 😀

    ur result is 80 out of 100 😀

    u know that u deserve the a100 but i gave u 80 enta 3aref lesh :p 😀 😀

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